10 Things I Miss About Living in the United States

It’s probably inevitable. When you live in another country for any period of time, you’’ll miss certain things about your home country. Alternatively, when you’re back in your home country, you’ll miss certain things about your new country. In my last post 10 Things I Love About Living in Valencia, I had just returned from the United States. This longer-than-usual visit (3 1/2 months) gave me more time to reflect, settle into a routine. Be there in ways I haven’t been for years. Here’s what stood out after this visit. 

10 Things I Miss About Living in the United States

1. Family. No surprise here. I always love seeing family when I visit, but this time was special. I loved seeing my sister every day! We’d discuss every minute detail of what we had planned that day. Then we’d regroup later and discuss and laugh about how every minute detail went wrong or right. It was fun to be together for more than just a week or two. Thankfully, I have an awesome brother-in-law too — we’ve known each other since I was 12 and he was 15 when he started dating my sister. That’s a lot of shared history, and it was great to hang out with both of them and reminisce about things we remembered, or didn’t. Thank you, M & K, for making me feel welcome every single day!

I also loved being around my nephews, nieces, and great nieces. Having the “little girls” (6 and 8 years old) do my make up was an uh, experience. I only have one face, but there are two of them. You get the idea? You gotta be fair. I was afraid to look in the mirror, but they actually did a great job. Other fun things: Eclipse (90% totality) Barbie birthday party, pool parties, Go Fish, trivia games, 4th of July, dance recital. Whewww! There was always something going on!

2. Books. Sure, we have lots of libraries and bookstores in España, but the English-language sections are pretty limited. The ONE exception is Booklovers, “a little oasis of English books in Valencia, and the only store in the city with 100% of books in the English language.” This fantastic shop has saved my sanity on many a day.

In the U. S. I popped in to a new-to-me bookstore, Two Friends, appropriately enough on  Independent Bookstore Day and used the celebration as an excuse to load up. The owners Monica and Rachel (no joke) have curated a fantastic selection, and I found several books that had been on my TBR list for a while. By spending just a little more, I qualified for a $20 gift card, so I grabbed a hefty cookbook that I had been perusing that promises I’ll be a better cook if I just understand these four things, “Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat.” My improved cooking will have to wait though. I left the tome behind worrying that my suitcase would weigh more than KLM would allow. In retrospect, it probably wouldn’t have mattered; the agents didn’t bat an eye when I checked my bag. 

3. Going to Matinees. I adore seeing movies on the big screen, but the ones in English in Valencia are usually shown AFTER 9 or 10pm. Yep! That’s right. Here’s why. Most movies filmed in English will be dubbed in Spanish. To find a movie in the original language, look for VOSE, which means the language original to the film. Since English-speakers are a small section of the movie-going population, movies in English are shown later and for fewer days. When you see one listed, get thee to the theatre! It’s very likely the English version won’t be around for more than a week. My favorite movie this trip — Thelma.

5. Talking to Strangers. You know how sometimes you have those little random conversations with people you don’t know? When you don’t speak the language well, these are few and far between. I’m a people person. I like talking to people. Anyone, anywhere. Speaking the same language makes this possible. Just being in the same line at the grocery store can foster connection. I like how a funny comment by someone can break the ice as well as the monotony. I may have taken these small interactions for granted, but I appreciate them more now. 

7. Shopping for Clothes. There are plenty of clothing stores in Spain, but I have not found much that feels right for me. I’m no fashionista, and haven’t worn a midriff since the summer after third grade, but I do enjoy looking put together and want to feel good in what I wear. I’ve been a J.Crew fan for a long time and found some great things at T. J. Maxx too. I wondered if everything I bought would fit in my suitcase. Nope. Fortunately, my sister had a large suitcase out to give away which worked great. 

8. Wearing Cute Shoes. In Spain, since I walk almost everywhere, I never wear footwear that could even hint at rubbing a blister. I have a recent painful case in point. Last Saturday, John and I were invited to dinner with his cycling group and their significant others. We were meeting at the restaurant at 10pm. (Yes, naps were taken.) I wanted to wear a new summer dress but clunky running shoes would have looked horrible. John mentioned that we could take a city bus that comes right by our apartment and it would drop us off across from the restaurant. Yea! I could wear a cute pair of sandals I’d only worn once before for a special Fallas event here in Valencia. 

9. Eating at Whataburger. My favorite meal deal hasn’t changed in years –  #1 Whataburger, fries and upgrade the drink to a chocolate shake, please. Ahhhhh. Perfection!

10. “Everything is easier in the United States.” Years ago when I lived in Italy, an American friend, who had lived in multiple countries commented, “Everything is easier in the United States.” He was speaking in the context of applying for a permesso di soggiorno, the Italian residency permit, but it struck me that even Steven, who impressively spoke seven languages thought so. Dealing with bureaucracy is never fun, but at least if you understand what you’re reading it’s easier to wade through. 

The week I returned to Valencia, John and I had to do a few resident document errands plus visit our bank in person to get some updates done. It seems there’s always something that needs doing: renewing health insurance, readying documents, making appointments, going to appointments, filing tax forms, paying Spanish taxes. A lot seems to come due for us in the summer when it’s hot and sticky, which can make something difficult an even more miserable experience. Thankfully, John keeps track and does the prep work on these things, because if it was left up to me my brain would have exploded years ago.

You have to really want to live abroad to put yourself through the seemingly endless list of requirements AND to navigate them in a foreign language. It makes you appreciate what you might have taken for granted in your home country. So it’s true that being an expat means missing certain things, but it also means enjoying new things you wouldn’t have known about otherwise. We feel fortunate to have the opportunity to enjoy both.

If you missed it, here are 10 Things I Love About Living in Valencia.

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Have you Read My Book? If you enjoy my blog, maybe you’d like to read my memoir about the two years I lived in Rome. Times New Roman: How We Quit Our Jobs, Gave Away Our Stuff & Moved to Italy is available from libraries and bookstores everywhere. Just ask for it if you don’t see it on the shelf.